The advice is to do it at the beginning of a negotiation, when you are still in an intense emotional state.
The other key element of this study was that negotiators were given two separate decisions to make during the negotiations. The first decision was whether or not they wanted to initiate eye contact with their counterpart. If so, what should be said? The second decision concerned communication itself: would the negotiator choose direct communication (“I feel angry”) or indirect communication (“We need more information about your company before we agree on our price bid”)? Negotiators who made eye contact and spoke directly reported stronger feelings of anger than those who did not engage their counterparts; however, once again there was no difference between those who used direct versus indirect communication. So here is another lesson for managers trying to motivate underperforming salespeople: Making people act assertively will improve performance only if it helps them achieve one specific goal—getting the sale!
Note how well Adam Smith understood something fundamental about human nature: “All for ourselves and nothing for other people seems, in every age of the world, to have been nearly the universal rule; but as soon as men become rich enough to purchase independence … even this narrow spirit becomes insufficient… . A man may surely love his country better than himself… ; he has always a greater reason now not only for loving but also for being willing freely and gladly [to] serve her all his life long…. He cannot take from